As I read the book ‘in the Grip of Grace by Max Lucado’, where David sought Mephisobeth to honour him because of his love for Mephisobeth’s father -Jonathan; it became clear to me what the power of love can do and how important it is in our marriage.

In this generation, we demand for one to be good to us or of benefit to us before we can love them back. But God’s secret to love is the ability to show love first, not minding the actions of the other person. This might sound contradicting but that is the only way the power of love can be activated in fullness.

My marriage is a testament of God’s unfailing love. I remember few years ago, during the hurt, pain and near divorce saga. I went to the Lord and He opened my eyes to the secret to love.

My marriage was nearly over and through prayers the Lord asked me to activate the power of love. I was angry and disappointed that this was God’s solution to my hurt, but I decided to try it His way; for I have tried it my own way and nothing good came out of it.

I began to say this prayer till date – “Lord, grant me the grace to love my husband through your eyes of love”.

It took a while but my attitude towards my husband changed. I began to have empathy over his shortcomings. I began to see that we were both flawed and could not understand how to completely love one another.

My prayer point changed too and I began to intercede for my husband. Years passed, hubby has not only fallen in love with me, but daily joins me to pray – “for grace to love me (his wife) through God’s eyes of love”.

This brings the scripture, Psalm 23:5a to bear “You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies”. This simply means that in spite of our shortcomings, we are granted a table in God’s presence and this gift of honour we should also share with our spouse, children, family and friends.

Do not let the imperfections of your spouse or loved ones stop you from setting a table of love before them.


Let us pray:

Lord grant me the grace to see my spouse and life in general through your eyes of love in Jesus name…. Amen!


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(Mrs. Ngozi Okonkwo)
Relationship Coach/Habit Instructor 
Founder Keeping Marriage Alive Initiative.