Have you ever driven a car that is misaligned? I have and it’s no fun at all. The car has a mind of its own. I desire to drive in a particular way but it keeps trying to change directions. The way out of this situation is simply to go for alignment.

So it is in our marriage too. Most of our marriages are misaligned. We desire a loving marriage cum home but our actions keep getting us into trouble, till we literally damage our marriage or find a way to align our marriage.

Steps to find out if your marriage is misaligned:

  • When we cannot have a decent conversation without quarrelling.
  • Can no longer stand each other and therefore need space apart always.
  • Dealing with bad habits like emotional and physical affairs, lying, living a double life and much more.
  • Finding it difficult to be transparent with your spouse – expressing your feelings, financial obligations, children and career.

If you answered ‘yes’ to any of these things, then your marriage is misaligned and needs to be realigned.


Take these few steps to realign your marriage:

  • Stop being in control and let God be in control. This is particularly hard for African men who have been taught that they are in charge.
  • Stop thinking of you and begin to think about how your actions affect the collective (marriage/family). This is very difficult for women who have been misinformed that a man should meet all their needs. This is not healthy and usually backfires.
  • Build a vision with God in it. Marriage is not really about the husband and wife. It’s God’s idea and our duty is to understand how to build a home that reflects God’s kind of love.

Be patient with one another as you realign your marriage under God.


Let us pray:

Lord grant me the grace to let go of  my selfish needs, so that my marriage may thrive in Jesus’ name, Amen!

For more tips on Christian walk click – https://www.keepingmarriagealive.com/category/wordfortheweek/

Did you miss the Saturday diet blog? Click – https://www.keepingmarriagealive.com/the-antidote-to-happiness/

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(Mrs. Ngozi Okonkwo)
Relationship Coach/Habit Instructor
Founder Keeping Marriage Alive Initiative.