Alfred Nobel read a premature obituary which condemned him for profiting from the sales of arms. This led him to bequeath his fortune to the Noble prize institution. Many of us will not get a second chance like Alfred Nobel did. But today is your second chance; what are you known for?

As we become prominent, we sometimes loose touch with who we really are. We surround ourselves with men and women who praise us. These sycophants praise us and give us the illusion that we are doing well. But great leadership, real influence and generational blessings is dependent on having three kinds of people in our life:

1) Encouragers: These set of people are different from sycophants. Sycophants applaud whatever you do whether right or wrong. Encouragers believe in you but caution you, when you are going overboard.

2) Family: This kind of relationship can be found with blood members but sometimes it is found in outside world. These group of people, know who you really are. Yet they love you, quarrel with you and are there for you the long haul. You can count on their protective stand.

Family is simply where you can be yourself while becoming who God intends you to be.

3) Enemies: These group of people are so crucial that Psalm 23:5 states the importance of enemies to our growth and victory. Usually enemies rub us in an uncomfortable way; making us stronger by we taking a shape necessary for survival in a tough world.

Most enemies are sometimes saviours, for they tend to tell you some truths bluntly that encouragers and families will not necessarily tell you; because they do not want to hurt your feelings.

Today, ask yourself if you have unintentionally surrounded yourself with sycophants rather than – family, encouragers and enemies (that comes with the terrain).

Dear friend, be intentional about those you surround yourself with.


Let us pray:

Lord, open my eyes to relationships necessary for my growth and victory and grant me the grace to classifying them accordingly, in Jesus name, Amen!


You can also listen to our last relationship clinic here 👉

You can also get our couple’s manual called ‘2 Sides of the Story book’ here 👉


(Mrs. Ngozi Okonkwo)
Relationship Coach/Habit Instructor
Founder Keeping Marriage Alive Initiative.