Stop parenting perfection or modeling perfection, there is only one role model and His name is Jesus Christ!

As parents, especially mothers, we tend to teach our children to look up to us. We set ourselves up as a standard. Sometimes we even compete with our husbands on who is a better parent or who love the children more.

This should stop now! We are co-parents with God, the Author and the Finisher of our faith (Hebrews 12:2).
Paul said we know only parts (1Corinthians 13:9). If we all only know parts and yet set ourselves as the final voice our children should hear; have we not set them up for a great fall?

We have many children who are disillusioned with life because the parents they counted on are gone and they have no one to look up to.

I also struggled with this myself for years. Then I began to pray, read and learn. Everything changed when I asked myself that if hubby and I leave this world suddenly, how will our children cope?


This led to some ground shaking adjustments that I would like to share with you:

a) I want my children to be the best version of themselves – God’s masterpiece.

b) I am still learning and becoming the best version of myself. So I am not the perfect example.

c) God, through His son is a perfect example of parenting – adoption, heirs, sacrifice, character and value etc.

d) If I co-parent with Christ, He will help me understand each child better. Thereby being the parent they need per season.

e) Let God’s word be the final authority in their life. When I am not there, I am sure they will choose the right way.

f) Mistakes are a way of life! I will no longer protect them from all mistakes, unless it will hurt their person.

g) Education is a process of learning not a final bus stop!

Dear parent, will you allow your children breathe and become? Will you allow yourself breathe and allow God in? I have allowed God in, and parenting has become an adventure.


Let us pray:

Lord, grant me the grace to let go and partner with You the Creator Himself. Knowing that our child(ren) are Yours before they became mine, in Jesus name, Amen!


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(Mrs Ngozi Okonkwo)
Relationship Coach/Habit Instructor 
Convener – Woman and Marriage
Founder Keeping Marriage Alive Initiative.