There are several questions to ask before saying ‘I do’. We will be dealing with 3 key questions to help you as guidelines:


Most people neglect to check out the belief system of the person they supposedly think they are in love with.

Example of common value/belief system:
a) Religion and denomination
b) Sex before marriage and fidelity throughout marriage.
c) Long distance relationship
d) Joint business or not, or joint account or not.

Will two people walk together unless they have agreed to do so?
Amos 3:3 (CEB).



This is very crucial in every relationship. As a man or a woman, you must look at how the person will help you achieve your dreams and how you will help them achieve theirs.

When last did you have a conversation about your dreams and aspirations? How did he/she react or contribute towards it? Their reaction/contribution is a signal of what is to come when married.

Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness?
2 Corinthians 6:14 (KJV).

The intent of marriage is to maximize one another’s potential.

Then God blessed them, and God said to them, “Be fruitful and multiply; fill the earth and subdue it; have dominion over the fish of the sea, over the birds of the air, and over every living thing that moves on the earth.”
Genesis 1:28 NKJV.



Most of us fall in love and decide to marry without taking a closer look or have close interactions with the family members.

According to my brother in-law; “snake go born long thing”.
Or “an apple doesn’t fall far from the tree that bore it” -Anonymous.
Even as born-again Christians, we must take a closer look at the family of the person we are dating. Then ask crucial questions that you need to know.

I remember a young chap who was at the verge of divorce. As he prayed about it, his eyes opened and he realized that the wife’s parents were divorced at this time. So were her grandparents. He took that into consideration and had a deep conversation with the wife. They weathered the storm and are still happily married.
Another great example is David who loved women and its effect on his children –
Tamar was raped by Ammon her step brother. Absalom slept publicly with David’s wives/concubines. Solomon had 300 wives and 700 concubines.

Please do not be in a hurry to say ‘I do’ till you understand the family pattern and what it will cost you.

Are you thinking of marriage or taking your relationships to the next level?
Then book a counselling session with us. It may save you the heartache of a life time.

You can also follow us on Instagram for more tips on dating and family –


Ngee and Rich
(Dr. Richard and Ngozi Okonkwo)
Relationship Coach/Habit Instructors
Founders – Keeping Marriage Alive Initiative

“Will two people walk together unless they have agreed to do so?” Amos 3:3