Comfort Zone Syndrome; the death of your marriage!
Through our years of counselling two things stand out the most as the cause of separation and divorce; first and foremost is – UNMET EXPECTATIONS(to understand this, join us for this year’s KMA couples hangout Lagos – https://www.keepingmarriagealive.com/2019/06/06/kma-lagos-couples-hangout).
2nd destructive pattern which we are discussing today is the comfort zone syndrome – “Just take me as i am”. Many couples pray for a spouse that will not only love them as they are but will take all their destructive bad habits and even more without complaining.
But as years have gone by, i realized that the most fulfilled couples are those who –
Love their spouses despite their imperfections; but still find ways to help each other become the best version of who they are created to be.
I usually tell counselee’s that hubby and i are ‘work in progress’.
This is the attitude of any couple that aspires/dreams of the kind of marriage that inspire others.
Have you ever wondered why you both are put together? The answer is to sharpen one another (Proverbs 27:17).
If you are not helping one another to become, some basic things will never align which will lead to selfishness and of course the death of the marriage.
Today dear friend i leave you with these 3 questions to help you break the comfort zone syndrome:
1) Do i love my spouse so much that i am willing to be a mirror of truth for him/her?
2) Will i choose to daily walk with my spouse, never giving up on ‘us’ even in the darkest times?
3) Do we have a common vision, where each other’s dream is represented and goals set to help each other achieve it?
Dwell on these friends.
Ngee & Rich
Founders of Keeping Marriage Alive Initiative
“Will two people walk together unless they have agreed to do so?” Amos 3:3 (CEB).